A Floridian in Brooklyn

Did you used to dream of living in New York City when you were a kid, or was that just me?

Hi everyone, and welcome to my first blog post! I’m Katie, a 25-year-old travel agent/grad student living in Brooklyn, NY. I live with my fiancé, Sam, and our two Labrador-Pitbull mixes, Mando and Riku. Whenever I’m not doing schoolwork or working on my business, you can find me hanging out at the Brooklyn Botanical gardens, playing with my dogs at the dog park, or in my living room watching TV.

I created this blog to share my thoughts, tips, and stories relating to travel, living in the Big Apple, and anything else I think is worth sharing! I hope that I can connect with you all better with the help of this blog.

In my very first blog post, I decided to give some advice on how to survive and thrive during the first 6 months living in New York. Even if you don’t plan on ever moving here, learning about a city as vibrant as New York is never dull! To do this, I’m going to tell you what I did for my first 6 months—so you don’t make the same mistakes I did.

When I was in my early 20s, I still wanted to live in New York City as much as I had when I was a kid. Everyone said it was hard to live there, both financially and socially, but I still thought I could make it. I’ve always been a very changeable person, so I assumed adjusting to big city life would happen naturally.

Let me tell you something: it does not happen naturally, even if you’re as fluid of a person as I am. In fact, I cannot think of a single thing about living here that is easy. Even grocery shopping sucks.

To really put into perspective what I’m talking about, let me share with you a quote from one of my favorite TV shows: “New York’s a great city to live in for six months and not a second longer and only if you’re insanely wealthy.” (Bojack Horseman, Season 3, Episode 1)

As ironic as it may seem, 6 months is exactly when I started questioning if I really could make it here. And now, 7 months in…well, 7 months in I’m still not sure if I can.

Contrastingly, my fiancé (who moved here with me) has had a much easier time adjusting than I have. In fact, he absolutely loves New York, especially Brooklyn. And while there are parts of the city that I adore, I still find myself questioning if it’s a city I want to live in for the rest of my life.

As of right now, I’m not sure what the right answer is. But for any of you who are thinking, dreaming, or planning on moving to New York, here’s a list of some of my biggest mistakes I made when I first moved here.

1. Not giving my super a gift at Christmas

This one surprised me. I had heard about this social norm before, but assumed it only applied towards the really fancy apartment buildings. You know the ones—awning leading to the door, elevators, a chandelier in the lobby, front desk attendant, doorman, the whole nine yards. I imagined that, in those buildings, it would be expected from the tenants because of how much upkeep goes into maintaining them. After all, they always look immaculate.

In comparison, my building is pretty run down. It’s not the worst you could find here—not by a long shot—but it is certainly not the best. When we first moved in, contacting the super was difficult. There were several things that needed fixed that I hadn’t known about, but I couldn’t get him there to fix them. The toilet seat was falling off its hinges, the tile grout in the bathroom was coming up in shards and cutting our feet, and our front doorknob barely turned enough to open. There was one time where I had to cancel plans because I literally couldn’t lock my door from the outside.

So when I heard that you should give a (usually cash) gift to your super, I genuinely assumed that didn’t apply to me. After all, he barely does anything for my apartment, right?

Wrong. Supers have a very difficult job of maintaining the entire building, which includes taking the trash to the curb, cleaning the floors, fixing any exterior issues, etc. Even though he may not make himself very available to tenants, he still does tons of work that directly benefits me. I should have given him something, even if it was just homemade cookies.

But the biggest reason this was a mistake is that now, it is even more difficult to get help from the super. He’s less friendly even when he does respond to our calls, and this makes for a difficult living situation. Don’t be like me, kids. Tip your super at Christmas!

2. Moving there with dogs

Ok, so this one is going to be controversial. After all, about 60% of residents here have a dog, and people keep getting them. I’ve already seen two of my neighbors get dogs in the time I’ve lived here. So why is this a problem for me?

First off, let me tell you that my dog is genuinely one of the best things that has ever happened to me. She’s emotionally intelligent, playful, has the sweetest disposition, and LOVES to cuddle. But she's still a puppy. When I got her, I was living in Florida where taking care of a puppy was pretty easy. I may not have had a yard, but I lived in a complex with tons of room to walk her around, and if that wasn’t enough exercise, I would throw her in my car and take her to the nearest dog park.

Now, at barely a year old, exercising her is easier said than done. For months, we couldn’t find a dog park that was fenced in, and we were too nervous to let her off leash just yet. We eventually found a dog park for her to go to regularly, but it’s two blocks up the road. That doesn’t sound like much, but with a reactive puppy and all sorts of stimuli setting her off, getting her there is a daunting task. But we do it—nearly every day. If we don’t, she acts like a menace and gets too yappy, which brings me to my next point.

The walls in New York apartments are thin. Paper thin. And barking has always been an issue with my puppy. We have been training her on it for months and months, and only now that we have been exercising her more adequately has she finally begun to break the habit. But in our first few months here, it was bad. My fiancé is a bartender, which means getting home past most people’s bedtimes. And when he comes home, both of our dogs can hear him walking upstairs before he even reaches the third floor. If they hear him coming and he doesn’t immediately walk inside, they go ballistic. It was so bad that now, I have to lock the dogs in the bedroom when he’s on his way just so they can’t hear his footsteps.

Suffice it to say, we definitely had some noise complaints, which was really scary. And even though my puppy is doing a lot better now, this city is still not a place where she thrives. We can’t take her to the dog park 5 times a day, otherwise neither of us would have jobs. But she really is the kind of dog that needs that much exercise. Had I known the extent of how difficult raising a puppy in New York would be, I might have reconsidered the move.

3. Not exploring the city enough

I know this doesn’t sound like a “mistake” per se, but not going out and familiarizing myself with the city made the adjustment that much harder. When we moved here, I had all these big ideas about how life would be. I was going to explore a new part of the city every weekend; I was going to make friends and go out to the coolest bars in the city with them; I was going to eat in a different neighborhood every chance I got. But in our first few months here, I didn’t really do all that much.

My excuse the entire time was that I was “still adjusting” and eventually, I would get comfortable enough to go explore more. But more months went by, and I was still a homebody. In all honesty, I was terrified of the city. Even more honestly, I still am. New York is the kind of city where you don’t know who you might run into at any given moment. The subway usually has that one person who is blasted out of their minds on who knows what, and these are usually the people who try to speak with you.

And most of the time, they're just rude to you. But everyone hears horror stories about the subway from someone they know personally: People getting pushed into the tracks, assaulted, robbed, etc. Some of these stories are about someone getting pushed into the tracks just for accidentally bumping into someone. Being new to the city, I was terrified after hearing these stories, and this prevented me from exploring new places. But exploring is one of the best ways to start feeling more comfortable in a city. It familiarizes you with unfamiliar things, making them seem less scary. Confronting the fears before they grow will make your new life in New York more fulfilling.

4. Not getting to know my neighborhood more intimately

My neighborhood is honestly one of the coolest parts about my life in New York. I knew that from the moment I moved in. When you walk up my street, the vibes are palpable—lively, upbeat, and it feels like a community. But I quickly realized that many of the businesses around here were out of my price range, namely the grocery stores. When it comes to New York corner stores, delis, bodegas, markets, or anything in between, you have to remember how much smaller of a store front they have compared to major chains like Walmart or Target. Because of this, they aren’t able to buy in bulk as much, meaning they won’t be able to sell at comparable prices to the big corporations.

Upon learning this, I was bummed. I had pictured myself living the quintessential New York life, where I simply had to walk downstairs to get to all of my favorite, local businesses. Instead, I had to find the nearest Target (no Walmart exists in any borough of New York) and do my grocery shopping there just to be able to make bills. This is a huge pain, though, considering my lack of a car. But it’s just one of the many realities of living here on a strict budget.

Once I realized I couldn’t do much of my shopping in my neighborhood, I sort of stopped exploring and seeing what it had to offer. I figured I couldn’t afford any of the stuff there. Even our local hardware store’s prices couldn’t compare to Home Depot.

Months later, my fiancé and I were at the laundromat and had some time to kill while our clothes were drying. We went across the street into one of the grocery markets in our neighborhood, assuming it was a flower shop based on the outside. But once inside, we discovered a quaint little market that sold fresh flowers, fresh produce, and food. At first, we noticed that the food was just as pricey as the other grocery stores we had been to, and we were resigned to accept what we already knew. But then we noticed the fresh produce and how unbelievably well-priced it was. And they had everything—not just spinach and broccoli, but bok choy, leaks, and so much more, all at an affordable price!

After that, we wandered into more shops and discovered that there are worthwhile places to buy produce. Not grocery stores, though—we still have to buy most of our food from Target to stay in budget. But there are so many little markets with affordable produce around here, and that is where we buy the bulk of our produce now. On top of that, we’ve discovered other places nearby, such as our local meat market. This was a foreign concept to us initially because meat had always been something you buy at the grocery store. But the meat market’s prices are incredibly affordable and much better quality than what you can get at any Target or Walmart.

No matter what you are looking for, exploring your neighborhood and really getting to know it intimately will make your life easier. It may seem daunting since social norms can be so different from other parts of the country, but once you begin to understand how everything flows, you fit right in.

5. Avoiding my neighbors

You’ll hear a lot of talk about how “real” New Yorkers aren’t friends with their neighbors. But seriously, don’t pay attention to this rule just for the sake of being a real New Yorker—be friendly with your neighbors when you move in. I had taken this stance after hearing it so often and decided to keep my neighbors at a distance. Of course, this rule can make sense if you don’t want to end up in an inescapable friendship: If you do have a falling out with your neighbor after being friends, the living situation gets more awkward.

But my advice is this: don’t become best friends with your neighbors, but be friendly with them at the very least. You can have a rapport with someone without having to hang out with them constantly. Today, my fiancé and I have since abandoned this stance and now have a couple friends who live in our building. But they don’t live on our floor, and they certainly don’t live next door to us. We are able to hang out every so often when we want without feeling obligated. If you do decide that making friends with your neighbors is fine, just try to make sure they aren’t on your floor.

Lastly, I want to mention that in some New York apartment buildings, having allies is necessary. Gossip does occur in these tightly knit communities, and having someone on your side can help when you (inevitably) have a disagreement with someone in your building.

Do you have any other tips for adjusting to life in New York? Leave a comment below! And please, make sure to subscribe to my email list to get updates on my blog. You can also get updates, promotions, and travel inspiration by following my Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. If you want to follow my adventures around New York and wherever else life takes me, follow me on TikTok. And finally, if you're planning a trip, hit me up so I can find you the best deals that make the most sense for your travel needs. Thanks for reading!